There’s usually a moment in all the best romance films, TV shows and books that goes like this: one person finally confesses all of the feelings that we, the audience, know they’ve been harbouring. After all the cards are laid on the table, the tension that we watched slow-build over time between the love interests immediately lifts – then they run off into the sunset together, and the story ends. In real life, however, “saying the thing” rarely follows a scripted path and vulnerability is not just a hurdle you clear to secure a “happily ever after”. To take an emotional risk – big or small – in today’s murky modern dating climate is to offer the gift of clarity, no matter where the conversation leads.

Saying how you feel out loud is the central thread in Hinge’s No Ordinary Love audiobook, now on Spotify and Substack, which features real love stories written and read by Tembe Denton-Hurst, Nicola Dinan, Curtis Garner, Raven Smith, and Rufi Thorpe.

It was also the main topic at Hinge and Dazed’s evening of conversation at Silence Please on Tuesday, August 11. There, in the Lower East Side listening room, Hunter Harris, Tembe Denton-Hurst, Nina Haines, and Devon Walker traded stories about honesty as a way to connect and communicate directly in their friendships, romantic relationships and even creative work. They also spoke about how emotional risks don’t have to come in the form of grand gestures, but are often more simple acts – making the random FaceTime call, setting up the date, following up or telling someone how you actually feel.

Throughout the evening, attendees shared their own personal moments of emotional bravery in a dedicated confession box. Here are a handful of the anonymous answers to the question: “What’s the bravest thing you’ve ever done for a crush?”

THE MOMENT OF CLARITY

“Ignore the voices making me second-guess my decision to full send.”

EYE CONTACT

“Looked in their direction.”

NO TIME LIKE THE PRESENT

“I told him how I feel even though I knew he was getting over someone else.”

THE WORRIER

“Opened up to them about my worries!”

THE EXCLUSIVE CONVERSATION

“Told him I don’t want to see anyone else.”

THE MOVIE MARATHON

“Watched the extended version of [The] Lord of the Rings.”

SLOW AND STEADY

“I said let’s take it slooooow (even though you’re really cute).”

THE UNREQUITED CONFESSION

“Told him I liked him even though I knew it wasn’t mutual.”

THE FIRE-MOUTH 

“I ate a ghost pepper because I thought it would make me look cool. I puked.”

THE COLD PITCHER

“Cold emailed him with the subject line ‘beers?’”

THE RECURRING INVITE

“I told him I didn’t want to just be a temp hold on his calendar.”

A FAMILY AFFAIR

“Met their mum on the first date.”

FRIENDS-TO-LOVERS

“Told my best friend that I liked them, at the risk of losing the most special friendship I’d ever had (we’ve been together for three-plus years).”